The following post is from Isa Torres, a student at Truett Theological Seminary and one CBF’s Collegiate Congregational Interns (CCI) at FBC Yellowstone in Montana. This blog is included as part of a series of posts from CCI-ers who will share about their summer experiences.
The summer started with the thrill of not knowing what we were getting ourselves into. Maybe, in some ways, we had a fear that we would end up alone, counting on each other in case something happened. Maybe not even that; maybe if something happened, we each would have to do this alone, on our own.
In some other ways, we were ready to get to know the church, the city and all the other transients we would find during our stay in Montana.
At first, I see wild Montana. West Yellowstone is full of people who are ready for adventure and who are constantly seeking it.
The pastor at First Baptist Church of West Yellowstone, Benny McCracken, is a man who is ready to go out into the Yellowstone Park and hike for hours and hours. Through this first connection, I learn that to be here and to be part of this church is to like the wild, the untamed, the unconquered.
And then we get to learn about what comes after the wild. Benny and FBC keep trying to do their very best in helping us be part of the community.
Being part of the community comes with many benefits. The communal support is there and we knew right away that we would not be alone. So that fear of being alone was gone right away, but a few and new concerns came about. Being part of the community meant that we were also going to carry with some of the issues of the past.
We have nothing to complain about. That is the thing about relationships. When we surround ourselves in the lives of others, we get to see the good and the bad. That may sound bad to some, but it gets even worse.
When we surround ourselves in the lives of others, they get to see the good and the bad in us. Being vulnerable is one of the scariest things I have faced, but it comes with great joy.
As we work with FBC of West Yellowstone we are also learning to open up, to give what we have and to wait patiently. So far, we continue to learn about the redemption we hope for. I think that might be a lesson that we will go over and over until the end.
We also continue to learn about the love that brings that redemption to us. And we continue to learn about ourselves, about our inadequacy and our poor attempts. If I had any false ideas of personal superiority, which I did (in some ways), they have been shattered here. They will continue to rise and get in my way and in the way of others. I have seen how unworthy I am, I have seen how that can bring pain and chaos, but I have also seen how Christ moves through us all.
We have heard good things about our work here. I keep thinking that we do not deserve to get such good feedback, at least not yet. I keep thinking that we have not done anything at all. But then, when I consider the words and the voices of those who have spoken, I realize that it is true.
I realize that it is the work of our God that shatters through our shattered self and brings life into our community. Even though I was expecting things to move differently, I remember how things do not have to be moved by me. First of all I cannot move them, and secondly I would only make a mess.
But when our Lord moves through our willing hands, then we get to see a glimpse of that redemption we are waiting for. We realize that it is a redemption that is present and available now, and that we are not to only speak of it as if it was something we will see later, but something we can see, and live in, now.
Benny and the church he pastors is a community that is ready for that adventure. Redemption is so wild, it is so untamed and we are incapable of conquering it; but we hope that we can be ready for that redemption, we hope to help each other seek it more and more.
This has been my experience in West Yellowstone. I’ve come with a group of people who are just as broken as I am. And we have come to a community of people who are also broken and who are also seeking to see everything be made right again with our Creator, and with each other.
We continue to learn that we have to do this together, and we realize, more and more, that we simply cannot do this alone. It has been exciting to see the many people, far from where we live, willing to do this with us, and to include us in their walk. It is when we meet those people that we see that God is moving everywhere.
Right now I no longer think that we have brought ourselves into something, I think we were brought into this. We, my team and I, have been brought into the movement of God.